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Oi Dog!

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Oi Dog!
Kes & Claire Gray and Jim Field
Hodder Children’s Books
My delight on opening the parcel containing this was indescribable: could it possibly be as side-splittingly good as its predecessor Oi Frog! though? That was the burning question in my mind as I began reading and it certainly gets off to a good start – for the dog that is. He has a squishy, squashy PLURPPPPPPPPPPP-producing cushion beneath his rear end: the frog of course is far from happy. The cat is quick to remind them of the rules: “Cats sit on mats, frogs sit on logs, and dogs sit on FROGS!” Whereupon the frog announces a rule change (can you blame him?) “From now on dogs sit on logs not frogs!” he asserts and thus he starts off a hilarious concatenation beginning thus …

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of assigning sit-upons in response to dog’s seemingly endless questions, for in turn, bears (that’s stairs); slugs – errm: “Slugs will sit on plugs (not on mine they won’t!), … “Slugs will sit on plugs, flies will sit on pies, crickets will sit on tickets and moths will sit on cloths.” (watch out for eggs then!)

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Next come leopards – I’ll leave you to guess that one on the frog’s behalf and pass on to cheetahs – tuck in everyone – unless like me you’re a veggie …

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At this stage the dog somewhat condescendingly announces “You’re really getting the hang of this,” giving the frog fresh impetus to pronounce on pigs, gnus, boars (a terrific Jim Field boating scene); then whales – brilliant dialogue here: “Whales will sit on nails,” said the frog. “I’m not sure the whales will like that,” said the dog. “They don’t have to like it,” said the frog, “they just have to do it.”
The dog then enquires about dragons and off the frog goes again … (there’s a tasty bit of word play on the vehicle upon which they must sit).

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Clearly he’s on a roll as there follow pronouncements on mice, kittens and puppies. Whereupon the dog wants to know about crabs and here we go again, this time with a glorious musical seat being assigned to hornets which after more banter leads to,
and elephants will sit on smelly pants!” and the dog’s instant gasping rejoinder, “Elephants aren’t going to sit on smelly pants!” at which the frog merely smiles and states, ”They are now.”
That seems to bring the discourse to a halt momentarily; and then the cat comes in reciting the whole litany of seating arrangements only to be brought to a halt by the dog’s question …

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And the frog’s answer? That’s yours to work out (hint: it doesn’t rhyme with frog); or better still, get your own copy of this cracking book and discover what he says. Suffice it to say that frog really does have the last laugh (and the best seat!).
STU-PEN-DOUS! I think perhaps the Gray/Field team have, between them, managed to out-dog Oi Frog with Oi Dog! It’s absolutely un-missable and another splendiferous send up of the prevailing phonics obsession in infant classrooms; or looked at another way: a brilliant lesson in rhyme.

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